My Dolly

Since I was a kid.. You were my only friend..
Since I was a kid.. You were the only one here to listen to me.. To tell me what to do.. To calm me down..
Since I was a kid.. Since they were fighting.. You were there to hold me and tell me things are gonna be right.. You were there to wipe my tears.. To warm me at night.. To close my eyes and ears on the things were happening..

That night.. I went down slowly.. You were on bed sleeping.. I wanted to follow the sounds.. To see what's going.. I started to stare behind that wall.. Saw him.. How ugly he was that night.. How devil he looked.. And she.. She was lying down on the floor.. I saw her tears falling down.. And I saw how she turned to blue.. But he didn't stop.. She was screaming.. And he was hitting her more and more.. I wanted to get near.. I wanted to hold her.. I just was too scared.. I didn't want him to hit me too!.. I whispered in the dark.. I love you mom.. I wish you would die dad..!

Ran up to my closet.. Held my doll.. And started to cry.. I heard her blaming me.. "Why did you get down.. Why did you do that?!" .. I couldn't talk.. I felt so weak.. I whispered to her.. "Dolly.. You are my only friend.. Tell me why my dad always beat my mom.. Why is he doing that..!?" at that moment.. I couldn't hear her talking.. At that moment.. I heard some steps coming around.. I held my breath.. I didn't want him to find me..! But.. He opened the door.. I screamed.. He didn't care.. He pulled me from my hair.. And drag me to the bed.. I begged him to let me go.. I told him that I didn't do a thing.. I was at my room all the day.. But he didn't listen.. He started to take my cloths off.. I shouted.. Dad.. What are you doing..?! Cried.. Dolly.. Oh dolly, please come help me..! No one moved.. No one helped.. After few minutes.. Dad moved away from me.. I felt so weird.. Bloods were on my tiny bed.. I went to my doll.. Held her so tight.. Oh dolly, tell me what happened.. I shouted.. Oh dolly, why you didn't move..! Pulled her toward me more.. Cried all the night.. Went down.. Sat on the stairs..

Who am I now.. Where am I.. Who is he.. Where is he! Why did you do this dad.. Mom was lying down with blood.. While I was sitting there.. Don't know what to do.. Thanks for being here dolly.. Thanks for sharing all this.. I guess its time to leave now.. I guess it's the day.. Went to the kitchen.. Took the knife.. Put it on my neck.. Scratched it.. Till I felt that my soul is coming out.. Till I fell down on that cold floor..
Goodbye dolly.. Thanks for being a great friend..

April 6, 2006
ButterflyChick