Unspoken words

There are just certain things in life that are better off unknown. things you wish you never asked, never saw, never heard or never even felt.

Now I have to be the strongest here.. The one who assure them that things are gonna be right.. But are things gonna be right?! We have been there.. Gone through this.. Fixed this.. But how many times we will fix it until its really fixed!!

Trust? Trust?! What is trust? How can you trust someone so blindly?! Why! Why would you betray this trust! What do you need more? What do you want more?! I cant understand why someone would do this! It is so painful! So pain inside.. I dont know how to deal with this..! All my life I was scared of betrayal and life surprised me with many ways of betrayals..!! I've seen it from everyone! Everyone I truly loved! Am I scared? Yes I am.. So scared of what life is bringing for me next! Things are falling apart yet I am trying to hold on.. Things are disappearing yet I am trying to clearly see.. I thank God for everything, yet I ask why this happened.. Why to us.. What went wrong.. What needs to be fixed.. Will things be back to normal? Will we forgive and forget AGAIN? Isn't it hard to continue forgiving people on the same mistakes they make?! Will Karma hit me on the face even when I had nothing to do with this!?

I pray silently.. I pray.. I pray to wake up from this horrible dream.. I pray to wake up again.. I pray .. But I am not even sure what to pray for.....!!